How funny God is. Lesson of the day: Life is not random. It’s only 11:30 in the morning and I’ve run across this idea too many times for it to be random (see what I did there?). I’ve used this blog a lot to document my recent decision to seriously recommit my walk to Christ. There have been many ups and downs and a lot of “God, what are you doing?” and even more “Just trust me, Simone.” A large part of the last few years have been identified as short-sighted on my part. In my walk I’ve prayed about the lack of vision and though it used to scare me, I’ve now found peace with it. The lack of direction has proven to be an abundance of possibility rather than a walk of aimlessness.
I’m starting to see through the haze a little. Not too long ago I finally gave my struggle with mental sexual purity to God and he told me public confession was the way to go. As expected, I was not at all happy about this, I was really hoping a quiet victory was in order, but after some fussing I came to terms with the fact that this was the only way. I’d tried freeing myself in every way I’d thought possible and nothing worked. When I hit that post button I had no clue what it would do for me and for those around me.
When I first posted that blog, I literally prayed that people who knew me personally wouldn’t see it. But they did, one at a time and it’s literally changed my relationships (for the better) with several people very close to me AND led them to change their relationships with other people close to them. Now I find myself wanting to tell everybody, there’s not much hesitation anymore. I’m free and though I’m not exactly sure where this testimony will lead, I feel a fire slowly kindling. I truly want to help others, women especially, in understanding what sexual purity really means. That it goes much deeper and reaches much farther than anything physical. So until I’m led to do otherwise, that’s where my focus will be. Tomorrow I will post a very detailed and honest post about how my struggle has affected and still is affecting me. I
hope know that it will help at least one person understand the magnitude of the issue and/or grasp the fact that they are not alone.
I want to encourage you to check back in tomorrow and if you feel compelled, share my post. I’m far past shame and embarrassment. The struggle can be so well hidden that you’d never guess who has to face it on a daily basis. I’m not asking this of for self-promotion. Trust me, if I was trying to make myself look good, this would NOT be the way. So I ask that you take a risk and put me out there on the off chance that it helps someone. Thank you all in advance and I’ll “see” you tomorrow!